This is an important distinction.
Small self, false self, ego, personality, mask
VS
Higher Self, True Self, Self, Being, Essential Self
This basic distinction shows up all over humanity's spiritual lineages.
There are subtleties and differences in meaning across them. For my purposes here, what is important is the insight that who we take ourselves to be is not who or what we actually are.
Further, all of our suffering flows from this mistaken identity (suffering as distinct from pain). [1]
Unfortunately the process of shifting our identity is not as simple as reading a short essay about it.
It requires many years of careful observation and devoted practice.
Many books are filled with detailed instructions and different methods and techniques that people have tried.
Many of these paths are effective, even if they take different approaches.
The familiar contours of your day-to-day experiences (affective tone, thought patterns, bodily sensations) are a kind of experiential groove that you are stuck in. Many of these grooves were laid down in childhood.
Like the people turned to stone, the dynamism and aliveness of who you are is trapped in certain patterns.
As we observe these patterns and gradually disidentify from them, our consciousness becomes more fluid and dynamic. We can experience more of ourselves, other people, and the world.
But again, this is difficult to comprehend by reading about it unless you’ve already experienced it.
It’s a bit like trying to teach a caterpillar what it’s like to become a butterfly. You can talk about metamorphosis and flying and the magnificent colors. Perhaps it would have some idea about it. But it won’t understand it until it has undergone the transformation.
The shift into Being is like this. But not so all-or-nothing. It is a more gradual shifting towards Being.
We dissolve structures of the small self piece by piece. It is a kind of metabolism. Similar to how the raw material of the caterpillar is broken down and reconfigured.
And our spiritual traditions do try to tell us. They speak of joy, equanimity, contentment. Virtue. Freedom from suffering. Harmony. Love.
But even this is an approximation, because the egoic self is not able to understand Being.
It’s like the teenager fantasizing about being grown-up. It is a fantasy.
Yet unlike getting old, this change is not inevitable. Most people reach old age having merely glimpsed who and what they are and are capable of. The small self has dominion and is not easily dethroned.
Recognizing this is the first step, hence the power of this distinction.
In Plato’s cave one cannot hope to see reality if they confuse the inside of the cave for the whole world.
If you don’t know you’re in prison you can’t attempt an escape.
Notes:
- People use these words in different ways. The main idea here is that "pain" is unavoidable => sickness, old age, death, etc. But "suffering", the internal writhing and extra stuff we do in reaction to or anticipation of pain is unnecessary... it is this extra stuff we can learn to let go of as we dissolve the small self as the primary way of knowing ourselves.